| [ MIT ] in KIDS 글 쓴 이(By): Renoir (☆르놔르☆) 날 짜 (Date): 1998년 10월 16일 금요일 오후 11시 48분 08초 제 목(Title): [유머] Religion == Programming ? 음... 이걸 보고 웃으려면 상당한 geek 이어야 할겁니다... 아니, 이걸 보고 웃는 사람은 이미 엄청난 geek 일지도... ^^; > Subject: Religion == Programming? > Date: Wed, 14 Oct 1998 19:30:01 PDT > > This all started when a friend asked if we could consider Christianity > to be "Judaism++". What would happen if some religions were treated as > programming languages? > > Judaism (J): Block-structured religion, with syntax literally carved in > blocks, although many J programmers argue about language semantics. In > program name spaces, there is only one divine object with global scope, > and no nested blocks may override its definition. Unfortunately, > debugging is difficult as the divine object cannot even be named, and > therefore exists only in whitespace. Most programs make heavy use of > "guilt()" call of "lman.a". Must use RL(1) parsers. > > Roman Catholicism (J++): Object-oriented version of J (hence J++). J++ > has overridden the divine object and provided a name, with other method > names seeing changes and new methods added (eg. grace(), confess() are > added to Man; "Messiah" is kept, "Sheol" is now "Las Vegas", etc.) J++ > Systems Analysts must, curiously, remain celibate. The reference > platform definition resides in Rome with changes and additions made > constantly. This could be blamed by the Senior Systems Analysts' > fondness for espresso and cardinal numbers. Rumours that the language > must be expressed using only Polish notation are false. > > Protestants (P, J++-): In a reaction against the ornateness of J++, > several European programmers developed P by removing contentious > library calls in J++ (eg. "checkCelibacy", "payIndulgence", > "enterPurgatory", "fishOnFridays", etc.). Different P installations > originally accepted each other's code, but, alas and alack, this is no > longer the case. There have been a few attempts to come up with a > Pcode virtual religion, but converting from one dialect to another is > difficult, and by the time the resulting program is finished running > with Pcode, the programmer ends up in therapy with a Jungian. Many J++ > programmers convert to using P, but the reverse is much rarer and more > spectacular. > > Southern-Baptists (Q): This is a dialect of P in which proof of program > correctness is an executing program. Q code which crashes is held to > be incorrect, but until this happens, it is nearly impossible to > convince a Q programmer that their running program has bugs. For some > reason, a recent Q language conference strengthened an old J rule that > source programs with suffix ".xx" must, without question, execute > commands given by programs with suffix ".xy". > > Islam (A): There is some contention as to whether or not A code is > inspired by J and J++ language features or if it just overrides J and > J++ methods. A programmers can easily switch between J, J++ and A > code. (However, several international J++/A programming conferences > held south of Tel Aviv between the years 1095 and 1272 turned ugly as > possession of the J reference platform was disputed.) Much of A > programming revolves around appeals to an oracle object named "K", > which resolves all collisions in the combined J, J++ and A namespace. > Many different dialects of A remain popular, although interoperation > efforts have been occasionally described as "internecine". The > reference platform can be seen in Mecca only by A programmers. > > Mormons (M): Inherits all method interfaces from P but completely > changes their implementations. This confuses most P programmers as > their programs will run on an M machine, but the programs have have > radically different semantics from the original. Reference platform is > in Salt Lake City. Young M programmers travel in pairs, handing out > language specs and programming advice for free. Many non-M > practitioners have this spec on their shelves, but never get around to > reading it. Legend has it that an M programmer wrote the precursor to > "Doom". > > Atheists (--): These programmers eschew programming languages, and > instead work with specification languages. They insist that a divine > object does not exist because it cannot be fully specified. They work > with J and J++ programmers, pointing out all the errors in latter's > code. Sadly, they actually get no work accomplished themselves because > of all the time spent specifying programs that never work properly, > although their one article of faith is that program failure is always > the fault of the programmer and never the specifier. > > New Age (Omega): A scripting language combining features from the > world's major religions. Some practitioners consider themselves > wizards because of the language's difficult syntax and semantics (a bit > like awk, sed and Rexx, but with no whitespace). These wizards have > been seen explaining their code to J++ and P programmers, but the > latter have not been able to make head(1) nor tail(1) of the > algorithms. P programmers insist Omegans are really pagans, but there > is no evidence of Omegans performing code reviews at the stroke of > midnight, waving dead chickens, or using assembly code. > > Waiting for lightning to strike my UPS, > > I remain, > > Yours truly, > > Mike Zastre (zastre@csr.uvic.ca) =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= 살아가는 것이란 변화한다는 것이며, Hoon (Paul) Kim 완벽하게 되는 것은 끊임없이 변화함으로 hpkim@ALUM.MIT.EDU 이뤄지는 것이다. (전화) +1-617-354-5694 -- 김 훈, 1972~현재 http://www.shinbiro.com/~Renoir |