---------------------------------------- TEACHER: Romeo, go to the map and find North America. ROMEO: Here it is. TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America? CLASS: Romeo. __________________________________________ TEACHER: Why are you late, Ronald? RONALD: Because of the sign.. TEACHER: What sign? RONALD: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow." _________________________________ TEACHER: Eric, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor? ERIC: You told me to do it without using tables. _______________________________________________ TEACHER: Bernard, how do you spell "crocodile?" BERNARD: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L" TEACHER: No, that's wrong BERNARD: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it. _______________________________________________ TEACHER: Ronald, what is the chemical formula for water? RONALD: H I J K L M N O. TEACHER: What are you talking about? RONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O. ______________________________________________ TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago. WINNIE: Me! ______________________________________________ TEACHER: Bernard, why do you always get so dirty? BERNARD: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are. _____________________________________________ TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with "I." MILLIE: I is... TEACHER: No, Millie..... Always say, "I am." MILLIE: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet." __________________________________________________ TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him? LOUIS: Because George still had the ax in his hand. __________________________________________________ TEACHER: Now, Teddy, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating? TEDDY: No sir, I don't have to. My Mom is a good cook. __________________________________________________ TEACHER: Clyde, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his? CLYDE: No, teacher, it's the same dog. __________________________________________________ TEACHER: Jason, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested? JASON: A teacher. -------------------------------------------------