유머란에 올려야 될까요? -_-;
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Ken Rockwell Facts
Monday, March 12 2007 @ 04:24 PDT
Contributed by: Liem For a couple long hours, the folks on freenode.net's
#photogeeks IRC channel dropped lines about Ken Rockwell, the
photographer/blogger we love to hate.
We created these morsels along the same vein as the infamous Chuck Norris
Facts, I hope you enjoy them as much as I do.
Ken Rockwell Facts
Contributed by liem, Epic|, Fufie, michel_v, neom, Wintre, Bas|k, lament,
mattsteg__ and pal.
Ken Rockwell is the Chuck Norris of photography
Ken Rockwell's camera has similar settings to ours, except his are:
P[erfect] Av[Awesome Priority Tv[Totally Awesome Priority] M[ajestic]
Ken Rockwell doesn't color correct. He adjusts your world to match his.
Sure, Ken Rockwell deletes a bad photo or two. Other people call these
Pulitzers.
Ken Rockwell doesn't adjust his DOF, he changes space-time.
Circle of confusion? You might be confused. Ken Rockwell never is.
Ken Rockwell doesn't wait for the light when he shoots a landscape - the
light waits for him.
Ken Rockwell never flips his camera in portrait position, he flips the
earth
Ken Rockwell ordered an L-lens from Nikon, and got one.
Ken Rockwell is the only person to have photographed Jesus; unfortunately
he ran out of film and had to use a piece of cloth instead.
When Ken Rockwell brackets a shot, the three versions of the photo win
first place in three different categories
Before Nikon or Canon releases a camera they go to Ken and they ask him to
test them, the best cameras get a Nikon sticker and the less good get a
Canon sticker
Once Ken tested a camera, he said I cant even put Canon on this one,thats
how Pentax was born
Rockwellian policy isn't doublethink - Ken doesn't even need to think once
Ken Rockwell doesn't use flash ever since the Nagasaki incident.
Only Ken Rockwell can take pictures of Ken Rockwell; everyone else would
just get their film overexposed by the light of his genius
Ken Rockwell wanted something to distract the lesser photographers, and
lo, there were ducks.
Ken Rockwell is the only one who can take self-portraits of you
Ken Rockwell's nudes were fully clothed at the time of exposure
Ken Rockwell once designed a zoom lens. You know it as the Hubble
SpaceTelescope.
When Ken unpacks his CF card, it already has masterpieces on it.
Rockwell portraits are so lifelike, they have to pay taxes
On Ken Rockwell's desktop, the Trash Icon is really a link to National
Geographic Magazine
Ken Rockwell spells point-and-shoot "h-a-s-s-e-l-b-l-a-d"
When Ken Rockwell went digital, National Geographic nearly went out of
business because he was no longer phyically discarding photos
For every 10 shots that Ken Rockwell takes, 11 are keepers.
Ken Rockwell's digital files consist of 0's, 1's AND 2's.
Ken Rockwell never focus, everything moves into his DoF
Ken Rockwell's shots are so perfect, Adobe redesigned photoshop for him:
all it consists of is a close button.
The term tripod was coined after his silhouette
Ken Rockwell never produces awful work, only work too advanced for the
viewer
A certain braind of hig-end cameras was named after people noticed the
quality was a lot "like a" rockwell
Ken Rockwell isn't the Chuck Norris of photography; Chuck Norris is the
Ken Rockwell of martial arts.
Ken Rockwell never starts, he continues